Wednesday, August 15, 2007


For the past few days, I have been the unsuspecting victim of a tumultuous converge of varied thoughts and feelings. I had been searching for a word that aptly described this sangam of sorts. But I had no special longing to look up some abstruse term in Barron’s High Frequency List. So my g33ky sub-conscious came up with this loser title.

Amalgam, as some of you might have read when you guys were chhote-chhote bachhe, is used to refer to any alloy containing mercury. Likewise, I consider myself the mercury which is undergoing metamorphosis due to other elements being mixed with it. Also, amalgam exemplifies the factotum nature of this post. It talks about a lot of things, and at the same time it talks about nothing at all. So read further at your own risk.

I am just back from Mysore, a lovely city. Mysore wowed me with its clean roads, irritating obsession with uncle-type heroes, I-want-to-be-here resorts, biking sprees, and overtly eager buggers (read kids). Make sure to visit it if you get the time. I’ll tag along and serve as your free guide (accommodation and food not included of course).

It was last year, somewhere around this time, that I sensed something different in me. I could not put a finger as to what had changed. But then, just like well-crafted sarcasm, it could be felt. I am sure that sooner or later, all that I have learnt in the past two years will make its presence felt. Maybe it’s evident in the discussions I have with my mom. Or maybe it’s making itself felt in the kind of future that I want to have. Who knows?

We dream big. We dream a lot. We dream to make this world a better place. We dream about eradicating poverty and hunger. But somewhere down the line, all these ideals are lost in the struggle to eke out a living. We go with the flow, like sheep. I am not saying I won’t be one of you, one of the umpteen sheep. But I will probably strive not to. If I succeed you’ll know my story, plausibly sooner than me. Make sure you are not caught napping then. Sometimes, just sometimes, we need to ignore that potent concoction of forty winks.

P.S.: This was written quite some time ago, 22nd July 2007 to be exact.


  1. I will make sure you dont catch me napping!

  2. "I consider myself the mercury which is undergoing metamorphosis due to other elements being mixed with it"

    Got what you were trying to say, but I must say I couldn't supress my laughter after reading this line..sorry !

    And yes, as always, you've written well..but the essence hasn't come through somehow..a very confusing and incongruous piece..

  3. i was getting this strange sense of deja vu, and then understood why :).

    piper - i think that's the point of the post - to convey a confusion of sorts, a metamorphosis. this post conveys transition into something bigger/grander than was there before.

    and dear narcissist, pray why do you think one would think this had been plagiarized? 'cos it's that good? ;)

  4. "the unsuspecting victim of a tumultuous converge of varied thoughts and feelings"

    only for the past few days? I live my life in a weird state of constant confusion. But then I believe disbalance is the only way to harmony.

  5. @pinky
    I better not find you!

    If the written word makes you laugh, it's the ultimate accomplishment for the author. Whether intended or not, that is a different story altogether. And I hinted about the confusion in the second para itself. Don't tell me I didn't warn you.

    deja vu?
    I feel it all the time. ;-)
    I am never "so" good. But I learn. In peace of course.

    I thought you thought about none of this stuff disturbing the lesser mortals. Thought about nothing to be precise (am not wrong now am I?). Where does the confusion come from?