Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Thousand Whispers

In a time a Thousand Whispers ago,
The entire world was our oyster.
Crumbling remains of shattered dreams;
Now greet the foolish eye’s saunter.

Hushed voices talk about a genius flawed;
In time that was a Thousand Whispers ago.
His tale now long lost in pages yellowed,
None can tell the fable from the lore.

His mind dwelt upon shores uncharted,
His heart, they say, roamed with hobbits.
Dreams not inhibited by the weird rationale;
He soared with them to the edge of fancy.

Expectations were dashed, hopes crucified.
Ambitions met with the same devil’s wrath.
Tears mated with skepticism and dejection,
His shadow now being the only company.

The Demi-God then became a lesser mortal.
A mere mortal, his glory now not flaunted.
Whispers passed uncared for, like lost love;
Hushed beyond recognition, all seemed to be.

Mustard walls now seclude the grey matter,
Ideas have politely given way to symphony.
The multitude shouts its approval of the antics;
He does his tricks, realizing the virgin irony.

But the mind, it does play strange games,
For the flawed learns to fight the odds again.
He fails more than he falters, telling signs.
Heroism in tragedy, it’s every soul’s disdain.

A time of a Thousand Whispers has passed;
Voices still mumble about that genius flawed.
The entire world is our oyster again,
Waiting patiently to be by that genius awed.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

RIP

Dear Readers,

It is with deep regret (and unbridled glee) that we announce the demise of our beloved (and wretched) friend, Lal S. He passed away (finally) last night. The hullabaloo was too much for him. It took its evil toll on his troubled (and diabolic) mind. We have been told that he died (or more fortunately not) in peace.

We all knew him as an irritating (and preposterous) character. Yet he, somehow, always managed not get on anyone's nerves. He was kind (and wise) enough not to intrude on anyone else's privacy. Always (quitet rightly so) minding his own business, he somehow became everyone's dear (antagonist). Even his enemies befriended him.

We hope that his mortal (and mortified) soul will finally find its rightful place in heaven (or hell). Please pay your condolences (and greetings) so that his soul might rest in peace.

Amen

Regards,
By Whatever Name You Know Me

~~~~

A concerned friend was kind enough to respond to the sad news. Quoting.

Dear Friend,

It is with a saddened heart and watery eyes that I receive this piece of news from you. The preposterousness of our modern times seems to have taken away our biggest inspiration and hope.

Just yesterday, Lal had remarked that he regarded restlessness as his forte. It is only heart-breaking to think that neither his soul, nor his body will ever be restless again. In other words, we shall never see Lal in his element again.

May his soul rest in peace. Amen.

Regards,
Anonymous


PS The name has not been mentioned in order to protect the anonymity of the concerned author.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Desi Jargon

Political slogans, movie dialogues, taglines, society speak, and even campus jargon that entered the cacophony that is Indian society, and stayed on. A write-up triggered by a cursory glance at a folder named Moments of Nostalgia. The folder turned out to be treasure trove of long forgotten jingles and songs, notably Ek Chidiya, Anek Chidiya and Hamara Bajaj. As someone might have said long ago, let the good times roll.



Hamara Bajaj The 1990’s Bajaj campaign cashed in on the immense popularity of the brand. The phrase stands for all that is Swadeshi.

Dhoondhte reh jaoge A Surf Ultra ad line that became part of everyday terminology. The tagline has come to encompass the very essence of invisibility.

Jhakaas Meaning very cool, was first used by Anil Kapoor in Joshilay (1989). The connotations might have changed perceptibly. But the soul remains intact.

Kitne aadmi the Probably the most famous line in Bollywood history. It was mouthed by Amjad Khan aka Gabbar in Sholay. The implications ae more
than evident, if anything.

Bindaas A word that means blasé, popularized by Startdust, and commonly used in conjunction with babe. Need I say more?

Dho Daala Clinic All Clear’s tagline claiming to eliminate all kinds of dandruff also refers to wiping out an opponent, as in Dhoni ne dho daala.

JLT Just Like That. Univesity parlance that moved outside campuses. Nonchalance personified.

Funde mat jhaad An excessive and irritating display of knowledge. Warning sign for all the desi Private Quelches.

Mera Bharat Mahan Rajiv Gandhi’s national integration campaign. Now referred to only in history books. A less than patriotic suffix usually lags behind its more famous counterpart. It goes something like Sau mein ninyanve beimaan.

Item Number Not just the movie staple, it is now stretched to connote the highlight of any even or show, be it a guest lecture or a cricket match.


Yeh Dil Maange More The TV coverage
of Captain Vikram Batra’a use of this phrase during the 1999 Kargil War catapulted the Pepsi tagline into common parlance. Excess is no longer a taboo. It’s fashion.

Tryst With Destiny PM JL Nehru’s landmark address to the Constituent Assembly on the midnight of India’s Independence in 1947. We continue to be inspired by it in more ways than one.

BTM Behenji Turned Mod Campus abbreviation, popularized during the 1980’s. Has led to several mutants, notably Aunty Turned Mod.

Vaat lagegi mamu The tapori phrase used across regions to indicate trouble. Made immortal by Munnabhai.

Bad Luck hi kharaab hai Endearing self-deprecatory statement with a unique twist of Indian English. Credits to Aamir Khan in Rangeela (1995).

Lambi Race ka ghoda First used by Dabur Seth for Amitabh Bachchan in the 1975 classic, Deewar. The metaphor has stood the test of times, quite literally.



Made for Each Other ITC 1963 slogan for its WILLS brand of cigarettes. Lives on in these tobacco intolerant times. The connotations change drastically. The tagline lingers on.

Dobara mat poochna A phrase coined to convey an attitude in the Chlor-Mint advertisement. Now used to express a certain kind of emotion, from irritability to unquestionability.

Yaara da Tashan The Thanda Matlab Coke line that finds favour even on the bumper of trucks.

Reference: Some nondescript issue of India Today

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Californication

Interviewer What's your latest obsession?

Hank Moody Just the fact that people seem to be getting dumber and dumber. You know we have all this amazing technology and yet computers have basically turned it into four figure wank machines. The internet was supposed to set us free, democratize us; but all that it has given us is Howard Dean's aborted candidacy and 24 hour a day access to kiddie porn. You know people, they don't write anymore. They blog. Instead of talking they text. No punctuation. No grammar. lol, lolmfa, roflol and all that. It just seems to me that it's just a bunch of stupid people pseudo-communicating with a bunch of other stupid people in a proto language that resembles more what the cave men used to speak rather than the King's English.

Interviewer But you're a part of the problem. You are out there blogging with the best of them.

Hank Moody Hence my self loathing. (Drinks from a flask)